The Slippery Slope of Porn & BDSM

How old were you when you first saw porn? I was 9 or 10 when I first knowingly encountered erotic photographs. My mother had bought my father the Madonna sex book and as a huge Madonna fan I had to see what was in that book! I also used to hunt around my parents bedroom and found various porn magazines, pictures of them in various sexual acts and amongst my fathers books were numerous ones relating to BDSM and sex. 4 years on and I was a sex addict another 6 working in the sex industry and 15 years later I was going further than most dominatrices dared. I lived and breathed extreme. I naively thought I was just a sadistic woman with a high sex drive, I was wrong!

If someone had asked me at 16 years old would I ever sell myself the answer would be Hell NO! If they had asked me would you shit on men for a living I would have also answered Eww NO! If someone had asked me, would you hang a man by his testicles with meat hooks, stitch up a man’s mouth, nail testicles to a wooden board or cut someone with a knife……… I would have giggled (cause it sounded like some sick shit I had seen in horror movies, which I may have fantasised about) but still would say NO!

Our thoughts change over time and sometimes we end up doing things which previously would have made us sick to our stomach. Throughout my career as a dominatrix, not only did I see my own limits pushed and stretched I also saw my clients. Sometimes I would push them and sometimes they would do it on their own accord. The longer we stay involved with porn and BDSM the more we become desensitised to it and start pushing boundaries.

I am not saying that all people get sucked into the world of BDSM and porn. However for those that do, there is an underlying reason! Unresolved trauma and stress are normally the cause of why we are attracted to this dark world or want to escape from reality! We sexualise are inner pain and turmoil. These actives and the feeling we get then becomes addictive! Addiction is a symptom of trauma.

BDSM and porn are like some drugs, it has a very low vibration energy attached to it. Just like with drugs nothing really matches that first hit. Maybe you start with weed, then ecstasy, coke, etc then years down the line you are addicted to crack and heroin. You are always chasing after that high, trying different substances to reach it. Oblivious to the fact that the low vibration energy is now attached to you and feeding off you. It takes control and uses you for its own agenda.

It is just the same with porn andBDSM. You start off watching some mild basic porn as a teenager or young adult. You maybe only use it to masturbate every now again, still using your own imagination most of the time. Before you know it you are using your imagination less and less and porn more and more. You start to become a bit bored of the porn you are watching and explore different categories. You have now been opened up to fetishes that you didn’t know existed. A new and exciting world is presented to you.

Porn isn’t like what it used to be! You don’t go to shop and pic up a magazine it is at the tip of your finger tips and you don’t even need to be on porn site to view it. Social media especially twitter is full of it! Even some music videos can be classed as pornographic and you now frequently see dark satanic videos by popular musicians. Sex and BDSM is glorified by main stream media and is becoming more and more of problem for people today. 1 in 3 guys under the age of 30 are addicted to porn, I dread to think what the stats are for older men.

These are some of the ways that porn and bdsm can effect you negatively-

Desensitises you to real sex and real people.

Gives you a distorted view of sex and people.

Can cause erectile dysfunction.

Premature ejaculation or inability to ejaculate.

Can impact your finances.

Cause issues in your relationships.

Stops you seeking a real relationship.

You can engage in mentally and physically dangerous/abusive activities.

Addictive.

You become attached to a low vibration which will hinder your progression and happiness in life.

I have seen too many guys start off interested in the milder areas of BDSM e.g. spanking, tease and denial or body worship and then 20 years later they are being caned so hard it hurts to sit down for weeks or they are eating shit! More often than not both!

So for all the guys which are newbies to the sex industry please be careful and for those that have been lost in it for years think about how your journey started and where is it going to end.

If you would like to find out more about what I do and how I can help you help yourself please drop me a message and we can arrange a free video consultation.

Book your FREE video consultation now

%d bloggers like this: